Lessons From the Past

This past couple weeks of my life has been very interesting to say the least. I thought I was being punked at one point and was waiting for Ashton Kutcher to jump out at any minute. Within one week of my life, I had spoken to almost every ex-boyfriend I ever had. I really didn’t realize that it was happening back to back that week. For the most part, I don’t dislike any of my exes. There was something that attracted me to them at one point in my life. I know how to get along and be cordial even to the ones that hurt me deeply. Now there maybe one or two that I also did some damage to their hearts. I am not innocent.

This week gave me an opportunity to really do some introspection and look at myself in all these different relationships. I had some huge realizations to say the least. I am big on being accountable to my part in the relationship. It is my pet peeve for individuals who refuse to be accountable for their actions and try to project their feelings on to another person. I am at a different stage in my life than I was even earlier this year. Some of my perspectives have changed and some have broadened. I was encountering challenges that were actually helped through some of these conversations. I had to face truths and some realities that some of the relationships in my life weren’t what it appeared to be. Some simple truths were discovered that gave closure where I was certain there were no cracks to get in the door.

I said all of that to say this. Be thankful for the relationships that didn’t work in your life. Each one taught you valuable lessons that helped get you where you are today. I learned so many lessons. It helped me also realize why there may be certain things I am not tolerable of today in relationships. I remember I had this silly mindset in one of my relationships. I just knew that I was helping him become a better man for the next woman. I knew already in my heart that it wasn’t going to end the way we both expected.

I think I held on at some point because of all that I had already invested. I thought I deserved to see a harvest on my investment and not let someone else benefit from the seeds I had sown.  I also had other people around me that still had hope that we would still make it because of our friendship. Truth is we are supposed to help each other to become better in relationships. So don’t be silly like I was and stay in something I know wasn’t going to yield happiness. At the end of the day each person I dated, I wanted them to be truly happy even if it wasn’t with me.  Your past relationships has helped prepared you for the ONE whenever you encounter them. When you meet that one, you will be thankful that every other relationship in your life didn’t work out how you thought it should.

♥ Tara Middleton

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